I woke up this morning after a good nights rest,
And I just laid here, cause there was no need to dress,
They bring you breakfast in bed
and you don't have to yell
Man, they treat you like a king
at the poor man's hotel
You'll never find a place
where the rooms are this cheap,
when you let life down
you can come here and sleep
for not a penny at all
you'll get three meals a day
no matter how long you're here
they won't ask you to pay.
Not all locations run the same
Some have a tube in every room
Some require you to mop
or you may never see a broom.
Depending on how
your head's screwed on
most people'll do alright
and statistics say that you'll be back
If you'd just stay with us one night
Country-wide, more locations than the Holiday Inn,
Check in close to home
you're sure to run into a friend
People from off the news show up
there is access to a phone
always someone to talk to-
you never have to be alone
You can debate with fools and intellects
over politics and crime
I've seen live sex acts, pro fights
and a short sold for a dime
Plus,
when you ready to check in,
you don't even have to drive.
They send a limo to pick you up
and that ain't no jive!
An armed chauffeur opens the door
and the trip is nonstop.
The limo is built for speed
and has special lights on the top.
And before you know it
you got a bed
in the poor man's hotel.
If no one know
just where it is
then ask for the
County Jail.
November 1992 edited March 2006